


Where’s My Uber?

by Erwins_eyebrows



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, First Meetings, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Mild Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-10-16 09:04:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17546723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Erwins_eyebrows/pseuds/Erwins_eyebrows
Summary: “Hey guys, there’s my Uber.  Let’s go, Petra.  Happy New Year, bitches.”Erwin heard the drunkenly slurred New Years exclamation, but it didn’t really register until two strangers were climbing in the back of his car.  One a petite, attractive woman with strawberry blonde hair and wide hazel eyes, and the other a short, muscular man with ebony hair and steely gray eyes.  They were some most attractive people Erwin had seen, but obviously too drunk to realize that he was not, in fact, their Uber.“Excuse me-“





	Where’s My Uber?

“Hey guys, there’s my Uber.  Let’s go, Petra. Happy New Year, bitches.”

 

Erwin heard the drunkenly slurred New Years exclamation, but it didn’t really register until two strangers were climbing in the back of his car.  One a petite, attractive woman with strawberry blonde hair and wide hazel eyes, and the other a short, muscular man with ebony hair and steely gray eyes.  They were some most attractive people Erwin had seen, but obviously too drunk to realize that he was  _ not,  _ in fact, their Uber.

 

“Excuse me-“

 

“Wow, an Audi.  I’ve never been in a Uber this nice,” the woman exclaimed, cutting Erwin off.

 

“I believe-“

 

“Oh, Levi, I’m so happy!  Can you believe it!”

 

“I don’t know what you see in Oulo but if you’re happy, I’m happy,” The man answered.

 

“I hate to interrupt-“

 

“Oh, yeah, 104 Survey Court.  Thanks,” the young woman provided, and that’s when Erwin deduced that these two were probably too drunk to find the correct Uber, and he would just suck it up and take them home.  They lived just a couple of blocks from him anyway.

 

“Is it just me, or is the driver really hot?”  This Petra whispered...loudly. 

 

“Petra, you’re drunk, and just landed the man you’ve pining for months, stop checking out the Uber driver,” her companion scolded, still never looking at Erwin.  

 

“But Levi, he’s just your type, tall, blonde…”

 

“I suppose he has big hands and pretty eyes, too,” the man snarked before meeting Erwin’s crystalline blue eyes in the rear view mirror.  The smaller man was incredibly attractive, and Erwin tightened his grip on the steering wheel in an attempt to remain his composure. He broke from the man’s assessing gaze to once again concentrate on the road in front of him.

 

“I told you he’s your type,” the woman teased.

 

“You’re right, Petra.  I’d take him home with me.”  Erwin stiffened and looked to see that the man’s gaze had had remained locked on the rear view mirror, desire evident in those molten steel eyes.

 

“104 Survey Court,” Erwin choked out as he pulled into the parking space in front of the quaint little townhouse.

 

“Too bad,” Levi said as the young woman climbed out.  “Petra, give me a pen or something.

 

“Here you go,” she said as she drunkenly produced a thin tube of bright red lipstick from her purse.  Levi handed Erwin some cash and grabbed his hand, using the lipstick to write his number on Erwin’s hand.  He was smudging just as much as he was writing, making the numbers completely illegible. Oh well, it was doubtful that the man would even remember him in the morning.

 

“Call me,” the smaller man slurred as he climbed out of Erwin’s car.  

 

“Your change,” Erwin stated as he handed Petra the exact money that Levi had given him, hoping they were too drunk to notice.  He watched as they supported each other as they stumbled to the door. He made sure that they were able to get inside before he went home to crash like the dead.  He had only been living here a week and things were already interesting.

 

*****

 

The next morning, Levi stumbled sleepily into the kitchen, rubbing at his aching head.  He was definitely not going near a bar anytime soon, that was certain. He poured himself a glass of water and downed four ibuprofen before even looking at Petra, who was radiant and beaming as she poured him a cup of coffee.  As long as he’s known her, he had yet to see her hungover, and he hated her for the ability to bounce back so quickly.

 

“You know, Levi-“

 

“Don’t,” He interjected, grabbing the offered cup of coffee.   “Just don’t.”

 

“Okay,” Petra giggled.

 

“Fuck, why did I drink so much?”  Levi sat at the kitchen counter, laying his head on the cold granite surface for a little relief.

 

“Because you’ve been working too hard for the past few weeks and you finally can breathe a little easier.  We were celebrating more than New Years, Levi.” 

 

“Thanks,” Levi said as he sat back up when Petra placed a plate of dry toast in front of him.

 

“So, do you think the hot Uber driver will call you?”

 

“What are you talking about?” He asked as nibbled on the toast, agony shooting through his skull with every bite.

 

“You gave our Uber driver your number last night.  He was quite attractive. Do you think he’ll call?”  

 

“Please tell me you’re lying,” Levi groaned.  “Of course I had to make a fool of myself. I’m hoping he ignores my inebriated ignorance.”  Flashes of beautiful blue eyes and golden hair danced briefly across Levi’s memory.

 

“Poor Levi.  You have no filter when you’re drunk.”

 

“I have no filter when I’m sober.”

 

“True,” Petra agreed.  “Now, enough about you.  I have a date tonight, so we’re going shopping.”

 

“Who’s we?”  Levi knew, but he hoped he was wrong.

 

“You’re not getting out of it this time.  You owe me after that stunt you pulled at Christmas.”  Petra’s hands planted firmly on her hips and the look she gave him was positively vicious.

 

“Fine.  But you’re buying lunch.”

 

******

 

“Levi, I’m sure it will turn up.  Did you try calling it?”

 

“No, I was hoping it would magically materialize out of thin air if I concentrated hard enough.  Yes Petra, I tried calling it, and it must be dead because it goes straight to voicemail. And, before you ask, I also called the bar and Isabel.  I’ve lost my phone, and Shadis will have my head. It was department issued.” Levi grumbled as they walked through the shopping district.

 

“You don’t have to be a dick about it.  I’m only trying to help.”

 

“I know, I know.  Sorry.” Levi grumbled.  “Let’s take a break. I could use some tea,” he offered as he started walking toward a familiar cafe.

 

“The worst part of all this is that you’ll never know if hot Uber guy called you after all.”

 

“That’s the least of my concerns,” he replied before he ordered for both Petra and himself.  She giggled and went in search of a table. A newscast was droning in the background as they waited on their drinks.

 

“Speaking of Uber, did you try to contact them to see if the driver reported a found cell phone.”

 

“Yeah, the guy I talked to wasn’t our driver.  So, I thought we may have accidentally poached someone else’s ride.  So I contacted customer support and they don’t have a record of any drivers with a black Audi.”

 

“Damn…”. Petra was momentarily distracted by the news report on the television behind Levi.

 

_ “In other news,, Nicholas Lobov was found guilty of public corruption, embezzlement, and blackmail after a three week trial.  The scandal broke earlier last year after an article appeared in the Surveyor alleging potential wrongdoing by the prominent politician.” _

 

“Levi, look!”  Petra pointed at the television, and Levi turned to see the photo of someone tall, blonde, with beautiful blue eyes

 

“Fuck.”

 

_ “Erwin Smith, the investigative journalist who wrote the expose, also testified at the trial, despite rumored death threats…” _

 

“I’m guessing he’s not an Uber driver,” Petra said in awe.

 

“You think?”  Levi snapped. “How much you want to bet that my phone is in his car?”

 

“Now what?”

 

“Hell if I know.”

 

******

 

“Ackerman!”

 

“Oh, you’re in trouble,” Isabel sing-songed.

 

“Yeah, the Chief doesn’t sound happy,” Farlan added, pointing out the obvious as he twirled a pencil between his fingers.

 

“Shut up,” Levi growled as he got up from his desk and walked to his boss’ office.  Keith Shadis stood at his opened, glass-paneled door. The Trost Police Department badge was etched in the frosted glass and CHIEF was across the top in reflective gold letters, which Levi decided was more fascinating than Shadis’ red, angry face.  He followed the older man into the office and shut the door.

 

“Why do I have a lost equipment report on my desk with your name on it?”  Shadis asked, a vein pulsing above his eye belying his annoyance.

 

“Well, sir, I figure you can read.  It clearly states the issue on the report,” Levi responded, crossing his hands behind his back.

 

“I’m in no mood for your smart-ass attitude, Ackerman.  You may be the best detective on the force, but I’m still your boss, you I’ll-mannered runt!  You will respect me.”

 

“Keith, you’re awfully red.  I keep telling you, you have to put sunscreen on that wrinkled bald dome of yours.  A man of such advanced age can’t afford to get skin cancer.” Levi ought the urge to grin as he watched Shadis’ mouth twitch.

 

“I’m going to ignore that, only because I get the privilege of addressing this report.  Lost cell phone. I know just the punishment for you.”

 

“You wouldn’t,” Levi prayed.

 

“You will report, in uniform,downtown in one hour.  You’re on traffic duty.”

 

“Fuck.  You’re a harsh bastard, you know that?”

 

Shadis just laughed maniacally.

 

******

 

“Nice uniform, Detective.”

 

“Blow it out your ass, Nile.  It’s better than those bike shorts on your scrawny ass.”  Levi studied the bike cop. “I see you took off the training wheels.  Congratulations.”

 

“You little-“

 

“That’s enough you two,” Ian Deitrich interrupted.  “Levi I need your help dealing with parking. Nile, get lost.”

 

“What the hell is going on today?”

 

“Some sort of arts and crafts garbage.  Between this and the Lobov trial, I’ve been in traffic hell for over a month,” Ian explained as they guided the traffic to various parking options along the street in an attempt to keep traffic moving.

 

“Sounds like fun.”

 

“It sucks ass.  What did you do to deserve this?  I thought you were promoted to Detective?”  A blaring horn sounded in the background.

 

“I lost my phone.  This is Shadis’ punishment.”

 

“That’s rough, man.”

 

******

 

Levi removed his peaked hat and scratched at his flattened hair.  He hated wearing the damn thing, and who knew how long Shadis would exact his revenge for the lost phone.  All he knew of his first shift of traffic hell was over and he wanted nothing more than a hot cup of tea and a scalding shower.  His nose was froze as were his fingers and toes. 

 

“Excuse me, officer, but you seem to have dropped this.”

 

Levi turned and looked down at his glove that must have fallen out of his coat pocket.  The hand holding it was encased in soft-looking black leather, and the arm attached to said hand was draped in a warm camel colored cashmere dress coat.  His curiosity got the better of him and he fully turned to see who was handing him his glove. He was met with dazzling blue eyes and blonde hair.

 

“Well, what a pleasant surprise.  I see you are doing much better.”

 

“You!  You’re not an Uber driver,” Levi accused.

 

“Not the last time I checked, no,” the blonde answered, clearly fighting back a smile.

 

“You some sort of creep or something?”  Levi’s eyes narrowed as the blonde let out a bark of laughter.

 

“I tried to explain that I wasn’t your ride, but you and your companion were quite…”

 

“Shit-faced,” Levi interrupted.

 

“Inebriated,” Erwin corrected.  “And, well, it really didn’t seem like you wanted to listen to what I had to say.  Instead of kicking you out of my car and hoping that you made it to your ride without further incident, I just drove you home.  It wasn’t an imposition because I live just a couple of blocks away.”

 

“Well, aren’t we just a Good Samaritan?”

 

“And I apologize for not calling, but the number you wrote on my hand, in bright red lipstick that I had to chemically remove, was too smudged to read.  Not that would have mattered as you lost your phone in my car.”

 

“You have my phone?”

 

“Yes.  I tried to return it the next day but no one was home.”

 

“Great!  Give it me.”  Levi held out his hand expectantly.

 

“I don’t have it with me.”  Erwin shrugged apologetically.  “You can come by place and pick it up if you like.  I’m on my way home now.”

 

******

 

“Would you prefer coffee or tea?”

 

“Tea.”  Levi walked up behind the blonde and wrapped his arms around him, placing a kiss between his shoulder blades.

 

“Are you even wearing clothes?” Erwin chuckled.

 

“Nope,” Levi responded, lips still pressed against the skin of Erwin’s back.  “I didn’t figure there was much point when I plan on dragging you back to the bedroom.”

 

“Defeats the purpose of you taking a shower, don’t you think?” the blonde teased as he felt Levi’s wet bangs tickle his back.

 

“Possibly, but it would be worth getting dirty again.”  Levi’s hands traced down Erwin’s chest to grip his hips.

 

“Most definitely, but you have to be at work in an hour, so…”

 

“Damn, you’re right.”  Levi lowered his arms and stepped back.  “Why did you have to remind me?”

 

“Just trying to do my part as a law-abiding citizen, officer.”  Erwin turned as gave Levi a playful smile.

 

“More like trying to get rid of me,” Levi muttered, with no real malice.

 

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”  Erwin leaned down and kissed the smaller man.

 

“Then you wouldn’t mind if I called you later, then?”  Levi asked with more confidence than he actually felt.

 

“I would be disappointed if you didn’t.”

 

“Alright, then, Smith.  I guess I need to go get dressed so I can get to work on time.  I’ll call you later. Maybe we can make dinner plans?”

 

“I look forward to it, Levi.”

 

“Me too.” 

  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
